i hate people.

that's nothing new. all my friends know this. it's who i am. it's how i see the world. if you think that's sad then suck it! i probably hate you already anyway.

my boss has developed an obsessive habit of cutting her fingernails at her desk. it's a daily thing. i really don't know how long her nails, or anyones for that matter, grow on a daily basis, but everyday i hear "snip, snip, snip, snip". everyday in between shopping for new furniture or checking camping sites online and telling everyone that calls her how overwhelmed and busy she is, she's cutting her GD fingernails in her messy, dusty ass office. EVERYDAY. AT HER DESK. i understand that it's a basic grooming activity. everyone does it. but it's one of those things that should be kept strictly in the bathroom, or at least at home. are you really that busy when you get home at night that you can't wait? why do you even have nail clippers at work? the last thing i want is to walk into your office while your clipping away and have a piece of nail hit me in the eye. from the way you leave shit around the office without putty it away, i sincerely doubt you make the effort to make sure all the scraps end up in the garbage. my disgust of you knows no bounds.

i am woman, hear me roar

nothing can get your panties in a wad more than hearing your own grandfather say the words "no woman is going to tell me..." in a sentence.

luckily, all i inherited from him was big earlobes.

people who should die

and now it's time for the segment in our show i like to call people who should die.

smokers. yeah, that's right, i'm talking to you, you disgusting pieces of trash. not only are you trash but you're flippin' idiots who are killing yourselves. oh, and not only that, but you are killing those around you. GREAT JOB!

what's that you say, it's a free country...you have the right to smoke and kill yourselves if you want? fuck you. you're free country having right is not just your problem. especially not when i'm walking down the hill to catch the bus and i'm stuck behind your cigarette puffing ass. did you know that when you blow out the smoke it doesn't magically disappear? it blows in my face, you asshole! oh, and when you're at the bus stop, there's a thing called wind that carries the smoke over to other people. and i have to breathe it in, you selfish prick! oh and i see you parent who smokes around their child. i feel an asthma attack coming on just thinking about the damage you're doing to your poor kid's lungs. i hope CPS take your kid away from your murdering ass!

here's to wishing you die a slow painful death...but i guess that's a bit redundant, isn't it?