is it wrong to have nice things?

so i kinda have a little obsession and i've been obsessing over this obsession all day.

i obsess over all things camera related.

this obsession has made me spend a large part of my tax return.

did i mention that i don't have my tax return yet?

what?

back off.

i don't need your judgement.

and the oscar goes to...

photoshoot
Originally uploaded by MsMonis

i'm not the only one who practices my oscar speech in front of the mirror on a regular basis, right?

what?

really?

oh...

shitty day, but then i saw this...

it's been a pretty "meh" day. got a headache. hate my job. wondering if i can can squeeze in new white sneakers (nike's? k-swiss?) in next month's budget. then i checked my homegirl's blog and saw this.

taking everyone out with a machete will just have to wait until my millionth viewing.

stupid fresh!

this baby is way better than you.

a valentine, from me to you

no seré
julieta venegas

no seré, una mujer perfecta
de las que volteas al ver pasar
no seré, alta y maravillosa
pero sé lo que puedo hacer...

no sabré andar como una princesa
ni vivir como en alta sociedad
y no sé engañar a tu corazón
pero sé que te puedo hacer...
...feliz

y aunque muchas veces no se lo que quiero
y aunque digas sé que veo todo negro
no quiero irme de aqui
para estar cerca de tí
porque sé que te puedo hacer... feliz

ha-pee valentimes!

another year brings me no flowers, no box of chocolates, no reservations at a romantic restaurant. just another night with my *G* BF, keeks. we'll go see step up 2 the streets (what a stupid title) and then a rose-mantic dinner at...denny's? mel's? chevy's? definitely somewhere with a possessive apostrophe in the name. over dinner we'll discuss what things will be like when we finally make it, hollywood style, how *dice* we are, why everyone else sucks. during the movie, we'll make witty, sarcastic comments, comment on dance moves, and wish that the 14 year old "urban" kids next to us would shut up. the world is our single person's oyster.

but, i couldn't help but wonder, what would valentine's be like to spend with a heterosexual male? it's sadly never been an option in my life. yes, dear reader(s), MsMonis is unlucky in love. but what single, neurotic girl in the city isn't...are you with me?

does it really matter that i don't have a valentine? i mean they don't even know if st. valentine was one actual person or many? so, who gives a crap he/they has a day. they can be facist anarchists and it still wouldn't change the fact that i don't have a date. my singularity (if you will) has long ago comforted me to the fact that it's just another day, no matter what hallmark tries to tell me. i've come to realize that it's the other holidays/special days, where it matters. and it's not about having a BF. it's about being around the people you really truly <3, and who really truly <3 you. sure, it'd be awesome to have someone to make-out with tomorrow. but it could never beat the love i feel when i sit down with my family to have thanksgiving dinner. or the joy i feel sitting in a theater, watching a shitty b-movie with my main *G*.

who knows. maybe someday, the person i make-out with can squeeze into the seat next to mine.

people who should die

and now it's time for the segment in our show i like to call people who should die.

smokers. yeah, that's right, i'm talking to you, you disgusting pieces of trash. not only are you trash but you're flippin' idiots who are killing yourselves. oh, and not only that, but you are killing those around you. GREAT JOB!

what's that you say, it's a free country...you have the right to smoke and kill yourselves if you want? fuck you. you're free country having right is not just your problem. especially not when i'm walking down the hill to catch the bus and i'm stuck behind your cigarette puffing ass. did you know that when you blow out the smoke it doesn't magically disappear? it blows in my face, you asshole! oh, and when you're at the bus stop, there's a thing called wind that carries the smoke over to other people. and i have to breathe it in, you selfish prick! oh and i see you parent who smokes around their child. i feel an asthma attack coming on just thinking about the damage you're doing to your poor kid's lungs. i hope CPS take your kid away from your murdering ass!

here's to wishing you die a slow painful death...but i guess that's a bit redundant, isn't it?

cool, a spork! don't hurt me!

cool, a spork!
Originally uploaded by MsMonis

(quote courtesy of The Simpson, episode: Boy Scoutz 'N the Hood)

hi. it's me, MsMonis. remember me? it's been almost 3 years now since we last talked. i know you feel abandoned & let down. and i know i'm the cause of your pain. is it my inability to follow through? my desire to not seem vain? my complete and total laziness? maybe it's all three, or maybe it's like a lot the last one and a little bit of the first 2. either way, i'm back and asking you to give me a second chance. i was foolish. i didn't realize how important you were to me. you WERE a creative outlet! you ARE a valid form of expression. you aren't just a vanity project. someone who's half filipino/half white once told me we were good together. despite envidence to the contrary about her kind (nia peeples, rob schneider, vanessa hudgens), she makes a lot of sense! did you notice the pic? reminded me of one of my favorite lines from the simpsons, and there was no one else i wanted to share it with. i hope you like it.

what's that? you want me back too? non-capitalization and all! i promise you that i won't let you down again. we'll do things right this time!!! we'll mix it up so it won't get boring! we'll be that couple everyone wants to be!!!! we'll go nuts with ellipses and exclamation marks and run-on sentences...!!!!!!!!

alright, so....yeah...what do ya wanna talk about?

Back from the dead...

or how mones got her writing groove back and re-embraced her love of ellipses...

hello friends! wow, i can't believe how long it's been since i've posted. thanks to my friend jen, i got the itch (ewww, not that kind) to start writing again. maybe writing is my calling. maybe i'm just vain and think that what i have to say is something people would be interested in. either way, i still come out good.

since we last left our heroine...

god, where to begin. i mean really, not a whole fucking lot has happened in my life or ever really does. hence the inactivity. i mean since december i've fallen in love with the office (UK) and re-connected with strangers with candy. javi finished his baking and pastry program and my mom got a chihuahua for mother's day. my parents and uncle frankie bought a house they are fixing up and i will soon be without a car for the first time in 12 years. oh and two blasts from the pasts came back into my life and are here to stay [well, one i know for sure (hi vinnie!) and the other i'm hoping does)...

yeah so i guess shit has happened...get over it.

sittin' on the edge of my bed...

wasting time.

i just got done watching the OC and reading forum posts discussing the episode. yes, i am a nerd. north shore is on TV. it sucks.

i'm finally able to get online at club ocho (aka my apartment) after a very trying and difficult ordering and installation process. since i have an airport express card in my swanky iBook and the fact that the phone jack is inconveniently located, i ordered a wireless modem. i was so excited after i ordered the service and modem back in november. everyday i would dream of chillin' on the futon or dining table downloading songs from iTunes or writing my weekly sex column for a trashy, free city newspaper. in my dreams i would be wireless. only plugging in to charge the battery, for iBook cannot run on love alone.

yeah, so none of that is happening.

stupid, incompetant SBC fucked up my modem order TWICE! and changed the date that DSL service would be available. when i finally got the right modem last friday (a month after i originally ordered it) i had to wait until wednesday to actually be able to activiate my account. i got online and then had issues with setting up the wireless network. after a call to a very wierd SBC technical support rep, i got wireless. but now for some dumb reason i have to sit on my bed about a foot away from the modem to actually get this shit to work. i finally gave up and plugged in the ethernet cable which really sucks cause this modem cost me $50. the non-wireless modem was free.

so now the 10 o'clock news is on TV (i heart dennis richmond!) and i'm sitting on my bed, online not wireless.

i guess it could be worse. i could have dial-up AOL.

uno, dos, tres, catorce!

hello, hello...HOLA!

hello friends. i'm back after a self-imposed hiatus. i've just been soo busy with my fabulous life of learning how to cook for myself and watching TV and netflix rentals that i needed a break from the blogger world. so, what have i been obsessing over the last month or so? LOTS. and luckily for you, it's pretty much all TV related. i love TV.

america's next top model rocked my world this season. eva won!!! i love her. she was definitely my favorite. maybe it's cause, like most sistas on reality TV (and like myself), she kept it real. maybe not. but either way, i'm glad she won and that biotch yaya lost. god, i hate her. eva just has something that's very appealing. she's pretty but not intimidating. her skin is beautiful and she has amazing eyes. i have a girl crush on eva. yes, i take this shit very serious. (or is it seriously?)

and now that ANTM is finished, i can devote my full and complete attention to arrested development. a show i place second only to the simpsons. i'm re-watching the first season thanks to netflix and i have to say it's so much better than i remember it. there are so many little things you miss when it first airs. it's the smartest comedy out there. the cast is amazing and dare i say it, jason bateman is kinda cute...kinda. never saw it on the hogans. maybe i was too distracted by sandy duncan's glass eye. i also have a girl crush on portia di rossi. anyways, people who don't like this show are the dumbest people in the world.

TV on DVD is one of the greatest thing ever. EVER.

let's see...what else do we talk about...

javi is finally in full force pastry chef mode. he's in the second section of the program, cakes. last weekend he brought home a tiramisu cake. (insert homer simpson gurgle.) he came home yesterday with all kinds of chocolate splattered on his uniform. he looked like he knifed a bitch. the other week he brought home a chocolate decadence cake. it was ecstasy. breads are next. YES!

this is kind of awesome...

i found this link on someone else's blog.

it may be old but i still thought it was worth sharing.

Fuck the South!

;-)

so, now that i've moved into my new place

i think i'm too good to write in my blog??? yes, yes i am.

totals JK, homies. i've actually got nothing to say. i've logged on everday this week and could not come up with one damn thing to write. i believe there are 2 reasons why.

numbah 1 - my 'boss' is out on vacation until the end of november. he's been gone for a week now and it's been pure unadulterated heaven! i've been reading everything that the internet has to offer. i heart the internet.

numbah 2 - i'm not really as stressed out as i used to be. as a result, there isn't much in me that needs to be released into creative energy. life - stress = no blog entries.

aside from my cool friends' blogs (i'm talking about you amber, sara, and jen, you fine sexy thangs) i've also become addicited to 3 entertainment related blogs. Go Fug Yourself is awesome if you are into talking shit about celebrities who dress badly. THE POOL HOUSE is awesome if you are obsessed with the most awesome show on TV, The OC. and last and certainly will never be considered the least in my heart and mind, my BF, zach braff's blog for the movie 'garden state'. people, i'm in love with this guy. he is amazing. and don't think i'm hopping on the 'garden state' bandwagon. i've loved him since the very first episode of scrubs. i will beat down any bitch that talks shit or says that they love him too.

one day he will be mine. oh yes, he will be mine!

DON'T CALL IT A COMEBACK!

i've sorta been here for years.

i'm here and in full swing of my new life in san francisco. it's not really 'new'. it's really like 'mones in SF, part 3'. but i have a feeling that this is the one that really counts.

the most exciting part about my new place is the awesome bed i purchased at sleep train. it's the most comfortable bed on the planet. it's firm, but not too firm. it's high, but not too high. it's white, but not too white. you guys know what i mean. my mom, being the coolest mom in the world that she is, bought me a nice bed frame. i haven't had a bed frame since my canopy bed when i was eight. oh wait, there was that day bed i had in college. does that count? anyways, it's neat. and very grown-up.

on monday, while getting ready to go to safeway, javi and i were listening to howard and a traffic report came on. javi turns to me and says, 'you don't have to worry about that anymore.' i think that's when i was finally able to relax and smile again. ;-)

everyday around the world, we're coming to america...

the election is over. i've had my day of bitching and moaning. i'm done talking about it. it's now time to deal. i can hate the rest of the country for electing that moron all i want. it's a known fact that the farther away from the coasts you get the more retarded and backward the people. i live in the bay area, and don't ever plan on moving to oklahoma (or the central valley for that matter), so those rednecks can live in their trailers and have sex with their cousins all they want.

it doesn't change the fact that although i hate this country for what they did on november 3, 2004, there's no where else i would ever want to live. this is my home. and, for what it's worth, i owe this country my existence.

my parents came to the US in the 60's. my dad came to california via guanajuato via mexico city via texas. he toiled in the fields of the central valley before moving on up to the big city, san francisco, to actually make money in construction. he soon found work and made friends with union folk who got him. i'm proud to say that my father has laid brick (not in that way you perves) in many a location throughout the city. those bricks you walk on down market street. some of those are my dad. my mom came with her family from jalisco and took a bus from san ysidro all the way up to san francisco. she arrived in the wee hours of the morning, only to wake up a couple hours later for her first day of school. not knowing the city or the language.

my parents had it tough. they did what they could to survive. my mom only made it till 10th grade before she got married and had my older brother, henry. my dad, who didn't make it past the 3rd grade before he had to go out and work for his family, had to get past the disadvantage of little education to keep up with his fellow union members.

they met in an ESL class at mission high in 1976. the rest is me...

i often think of what my life would have been like had my parents never come. i obviously wouldn't be alive. they met here. but taking into account where my parents came from, i know what my future would have been. a hard life with little opportunity. not really caring about foreign policy or what the people in another state thought. just trying to survive.

i'm american. it's undeniable. it's part of who i am. the man they happened to elect president does NOT define me. this story does...and it's only part of it.

highway to hell

i change my mind.

i hate this country.

i don't know what you've been told...

but bush in office is gettin' old!

election day is upon us. one of the few events where i feel like draping the american flag over my shoulders and singing the national anthem. when i'm the proudest to be born in this country, the daughter of immigrants. the other being whenever the US wins a gold medal in the olympics. USA! USA! USA!

anyways, CNN is really pissing me off by not having any election results posted yet. i can't be at home glued in front of my beloved TV today. give me something...ANYTHING!

did anyone else catch kerry and bush being interviewed by don francisco during sabado gigante this past weekend?? now that's what i'm talkin about! not a lot of attention has been given to the latino vote. sure, it's all over noticiero univision, but i don't see anyone else making a big deal about it. maybe it's just me.

anyways, enough political shit. the emotional breakdown i was suffering in the last 2 entries is finally over. i will be signing my new lease in about 3 hours and moving into my apartment this weekend. the extravagant, jet-setting lifestyle i led while living rent free is no more. today is born a new me!!!!!

it's better to look at the glass as half-empty...

that way you have no where to go but up.

looks like i won't be moving this weekend. the lease is not ready and will supposedly be written up today and mailed to me. which was not what was agreed upon but whatever. the property "manager" (in quotes cause he don't do shit!) told sara that he has to review the apartment before i move in. that's neat and all, but he's known all month that this was going to happen. this shit should have been settled already. but it's not and now my move/my life is on hiatus.

i would really like to tell them all to shove it up their asses, but i won't find a deal like that anywhere near the city. the price is decent, the studio is big, there's always street parking and it's about 50 steps to 2 muni lines. i guess i just need to put up with the long commute & gas prices a little bit more.

hopefully not much longer. it's getting harder and harder to control my road rage.

AAHHHHHH!

ok, so the plan is (and has been) to move into my deluxe studio in the sky this weekend. saturday. october 30th. 30 hours from now. should i be worried that i don't have a lease yet??? cause i am.

worried is not really the word. I'M FUCKING FREAKING OUT. this whole month has just been a roller-coaster of emotions. i'm happy. i'm frustrated. i'm excited. i'm sad. i'm anxious. i'm mellow. i can't flippin take it anymore. one big obstacle that hung over my head had to do with javi (my youngest brother). he's starting a baking and pastry chef certificate program on november 1st at the california culinery academy. they may be a world renowned institution, but their admissions staff are a bunch of fuck-wads. and i know about fuck-wads. i work in admissions at fuck-wad state university. anyways, his financial aid didn't get settled until tuesday and it had my whole family's chonies in a wad. i don't remember having any problem with my financial aid. all i did was sign a whole bunch of paperwork. on the 5th of november i'll have payment 16 of 537,568 deducted from my checking account. NEAT!

so that's been taken care of and it truly is a great relief, but my futon is being delivered on saturday and I DON'T HAVE A LEASE. ok, i know, stop freaking out. everything will work out. blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. i can't help but feel, though, like i'm stuck in limbo. it's not my apartment yet. but then again, it's not like it's not mine. they know i'm moving in. i have the keys. (thanks sara!) i just need things to be settled. i need the legality of my signature on a fucking piece of paper. i need money to be exchanged. i need it to be mine.

movin' on up...to a deluxe studio in SF

so, as i touched upon in my last post, i'm moving back to the city after an 18 year (minus 6 months) hiatus. i have a feeling that this is it. the final jump out of the bird's nest i call 1## carlisle way. (the address has been hidden to protect Mones from stalkers.)

how do i feel about this? i'm definitely excited....a nervous kind of excited, but excited nonetheless. i think the financial aspects of it all are what's freaking me out the most, especially since i now have car payments. not cheap car payments. after i convince myself that i will be able to save money and budget (yeah, right) i'll then start to be sad about being away from my family. i know that sounds dumb. i'm 27 years old and i need to grow up and deal. but i find that the older i get the more attached to them i become. i think this has to do with the fact that the 90's were hard on my family. my brother married twice. my parents had to declare bankruptcy. tito and javi were really young and being raised by a series of central american 'nannies'. i fought a lot with my mom and then left for UOP. now, except for the fact that i sleep on the couch, everything is great.

but my delayed single girl in her 20's life and mental health need some attending to. my new digs are exactly 1.2 miles from work. until i find a new (read: better) job, my commute will be cut from 3-4 hours a day to about 20 mins. it's mind boggling. i still can't believe it. 20 freakin minutes! i'll be home everyday before 530pm. 530! it's INSANE! i think i'll start up a new hobbie. maybe i'll start going to the gym again.

so many possibilities. the world is my oyster.