why the fuck did i even go to college then?!?!?!

ok, so i've been actively job hunting since mid-september (when my 2 homegirls at work finally were able to crawl out of this bottomless pit of negativity and soul-sucking hopelessness). i miraculously received calls from the first 2 places i submitted my resume at.

i interviewed at holy names university in oak-town last tuesday for the position of admissions counselor. i was looking like a tough bitch in my new pin-striped suit and feel like i had a really good interview, despite the fact that i was interviewed by 4 people, 2 of them being nuns. i think it was busting out with a piece from the 'sound of music' that sealed the deal. it's been a week and a day....no call yet from frauline maria.

the other call was for an admissions and records job at diablo valley college in concord. yes, concord does suck, but it's only 20 mins from b-town and one bridge toll instead of 2. unfortunately, it wasn't for an interview. the job required me to be able to type at least 40wpm and to prove it with a certification from the county human resources office. so on wednesday i drove my happy little ass over to walnut creek and took a typing test....actually it was more like 6 typing tests. having NEVER needed to take a typing test before, i didn't realize that after calculating your words per minute the flippin' computer DEDUCTS a word for EVERY single mistake you make. EVEN IF YOU CORRECT IT!!!!! so, although i was typing my ass off and getting as high as 56wpm all my mistakes were bringing it down to as low as 26wpm. the highest score i got was 36wpm. now, before any of you call me a retard and accuse me of only using my index fingers to type, i must inform you all that i use an ergonomic keyboard at work and the keyboard i used for the test WAS NOT ergonomic. my wrists would start hurting at about the 2 minute mark. (it was a 5 minute test.) the more tests i took, the worse my score, the more frustrated i became. i walked out hating the contra costa college community college district. my friends and co-workers tried to console me saying that it may not be such a big deal. they just may need to know that you can type. despite their good thoughts, i still felt like a dumb ass. my feelings of dumb assness were finally confirmed last night when i opened a letter from the human resources dept for the colleges of contra costa that read:

Other candidates who better met the qualifications and needs of the District were asked to proceed further in the process.

are they fucking telling me that my 2 years in graduate admissions and year and a half helping fucking clueless students at HSF aren't enough to fucking work at your dumb school? are they seriously telling me, that the ONLY way to be able to perform the duties for an admissions and records job is to type fast?!?!?! no brain usage required?!?!?!?!?!

i should of just done what all the other mexicans did and major in chicano/la raza studies. at least i'd know why i was not qualified for anything.

***this post is dedicated to the university of the pacific. twas not for your $96,000 education i would not be where i am today.