sittin' on the edge of my bed...

wasting time.

i just got done watching the OC and reading forum posts discussing the episode. yes, i am a nerd. north shore is on TV. it sucks.

i'm finally able to get online at club ocho (aka my apartment) after a very trying and difficult ordering and installation process. since i have an airport express card in my swanky iBook and the fact that the phone jack is inconveniently located, i ordered a wireless modem. i was so excited after i ordered the service and modem back in november. everyday i would dream of chillin' on the futon or dining table downloading songs from iTunes or writing my weekly sex column for a trashy, free city newspaper. in my dreams i would be wireless. only plugging in to charge the battery, for iBook cannot run on love alone.

yeah, so none of that is happening.

stupid, incompetant SBC fucked up my modem order TWICE! and changed the date that DSL service would be available. when i finally got the right modem last friday (a month after i originally ordered it) i had to wait until wednesday to actually be able to activiate my account. i got online and then had issues with setting up the wireless network. after a call to a very wierd SBC technical support rep, i got wireless. but now for some dumb reason i have to sit on my bed about a foot away from the modem to actually get this shit to work. i finally gave up and plugged in the ethernet cable which really sucks cause this modem cost me $50. the non-wireless modem was free.

so now the 10 o'clock news is on TV (i heart dennis richmond!) and i'm sitting on my bed, online not wireless.

i guess it could be worse. i could have dial-up AOL.

uno, dos, tres, catorce!

hello, hello...HOLA!

hello friends. i'm back after a self-imposed hiatus. i've just been soo busy with my fabulous life of learning how to cook for myself and watching TV and netflix rentals that i needed a break from the blogger world. so, what have i been obsessing over the last month or so? LOTS. and luckily for you, it's pretty much all TV related. i love TV.

america's next top model rocked my world this season. eva won!!! i love her. she was definitely my favorite. maybe it's cause, like most sistas on reality TV (and like myself), she kept it real. maybe not. but either way, i'm glad she won and that biotch yaya lost. god, i hate her. eva just has something that's very appealing. she's pretty but not intimidating. her skin is beautiful and she has amazing eyes. i have a girl crush on eva. yes, i take this shit very serious. (or is it seriously?)

and now that ANTM is finished, i can devote my full and complete attention to arrested development. a show i place second only to the simpsons. i'm re-watching the first season thanks to netflix and i have to say it's so much better than i remember it. there are so many little things you miss when it first airs. it's the smartest comedy out there. the cast is amazing and dare i say it, jason bateman is kinda cute...kinda. never saw it on the hogans. maybe i was too distracted by sandy duncan's glass eye. i also have a girl crush on portia di rossi. anyways, people who don't like this show are the dumbest people in the world.

TV on DVD is one of the greatest thing ever. EVER.

let's see...what else do we talk about...

javi is finally in full force pastry chef mode. he's in the second section of the program, cakes. last weekend he brought home a tiramisu cake. (insert homer simpson gurgle.) he came home yesterday with all kinds of chocolate splattered on his uniform. he looked like he knifed a bitch. the other week he brought home a chocolate decadence cake. it was ecstasy. breads are next. YES!

this is kind of awesome...

i found this link on someone else's blog.

it may be old but i still thought it was worth sharing.

Fuck the South!

;-)

so, now that i've moved into my new place

i think i'm too good to write in my blog??? yes, yes i am.

totals JK, homies. i've actually got nothing to say. i've logged on everday this week and could not come up with one damn thing to write. i believe there are 2 reasons why.

numbah 1 - my 'boss' is out on vacation until the end of november. he's been gone for a week now and it's been pure unadulterated heaven! i've been reading everything that the internet has to offer. i heart the internet.

numbah 2 - i'm not really as stressed out as i used to be. as a result, there isn't much in me that needs to be released into creative energy. life - stress = no blog entries.

aside from my cool friends' blogs (i'm talking about you amber, sara, and jen, you fine sexy thangs) i've also become addicited to 3 entertainment related blogs. Go Fug Yourself is awesome if you are into talking shit about celebrities who dress badly. THE POOL HOUSE is awesome if you are obsessed with the most awesome show on TV, The OC. and last and certainly will never be considered the least in my heart and mind, my BF, zach braff's blog for the movie 'garden state'. people, i'm in love with this guy. he is amazing. and don't think i'm hopping on the 'garden state' bandwagon. i've loved him since the very first episode of scrubs. i will beat down any bitch that talks shit or says that they love him too.

one day he will be mine. oh yes, he will be mine!

DON'T CALL IT A COMEBACK!

i've sorta been here for years.

i'm here and in full swing of my new life in san francisco. it's not really 'new'. it's really like 'mones in SF, part 3'. but i have a feeling that this is the one that really counts.

the most exciting part about my new place is the awesome bed i purchased at sleep train. it's the most comfortable bed on the planet. it's firm, but not too firm. it's high, but not too high. it's white, but not too white. you guys know what i mean. my mom, being the coolest mom in the world that she is, bought me a nice bed frame. i haven't had a bed frame since my canopy bed when i was eight. oh wait, there was that day bed i had in college. does that count? anyways, it's neat. and very grown-up.

on monday, while getting ready to go to safeway, javi and i were listening to howard and a traffic report came on. javi turns to me and says, 'you don't have to worry about that anymore.' i think that's when i was finally able to relax and smile again. ;-)

everyday around the world, we're coming to america...

the election is over. i've had my day of bitching and moaning. i'm done talking about it. it's now time to deal. i can hate the rest of the country for electing that moron all i want. it's a known fact that the farther away from the coasts you get the more retarded and backward the people. i live in the bay area, and don't ever plan on moving to oklahoma (or the central valley for that matter), so those rednecks can live in their trailers and have sex with their cousins all they want.

it doesn't change the fact that although i hate this country for what they did on november 3, 2004, there's no where else i would ever want to live. this is my home. and, for what it's worth, i owe this country my existence.

my parents came to the US in the 60's. my dad came to california via guanajuato via mexico city via texas. he toiled in the fields of the central valley before moving on up to the big city, san francisco, to actually make money in construction. he soon found work and made friends with union folk who got him. i'm proud to say that my father has laid brick (not in that way you perves) in many a location throughout the city. those bricks you walk on down market street. some of those are my dad. my mom came with her family from jalisco and took a bus from san ysidro all the way up to san francisco. she arrived in the wee hours of the morning, only to wake up a couple hours later for her first day of school. not knowing the city or the language.

my parents had it tough. they did what they could to survive. my mom only made it till 10th grade before she got married and had my older brother, henry. my dad, who didn't make it past the 3rd grade before he had to go out and work for his family, had to get past the disadvantage of little education to keep up with his fellow union members.

they met in an ESL class at mission high in 1976. the rest is me...

i often think of what my life would have been like had my parents never come. i obviously wouldn't be alive. they met here. but taking into account where my parents came from, i know what my future would have been. a hard life with little opportunity. not really caring about foreign policy or what the people in another state thought. just trying to survive.

i'm american. it's undeniable. it's part of who i am. the man they happened to elect president does NOT define me. this story does...and it's only part of it.

highway to hell

i change my mind.

i hate this country.

i don't know what you've been told...

but bush in office is gettin' old!

election day is upon us. one of the few events where i feel like draping the american flag over my shoulders and singing the national anthem. when i'm the proudest to be born in this country, the daughter of immigrants. the other being whenever the US wins a gold medal in the olympics. USA! USA! USA!

anyways, CNN is really pissing me off by not having any election results posted yet. i can't be at home glued in front of my beloved TV today. give me something...ANYTHING!

did anyone else catch kerry and bush being interviewed by don francisco during sabado gigante this past weekend?? now that's what i'm talkin about! not a lot of attention has been given to the latino vote. sure, it's all over noticiero univision, but i don't see anyone else making a big deal about it. maybe it's just me.

anyways, enough political shit. the emotional breakdown i was suffering in the last 2 entries is finally over. i will be signing my new lease in about 3 hours and moving into my apartment this weekend. the extravagant, jet-setting lifestyle i led while living rent free is no more. today is born a new me!!!!!

it's better to look at the glass as half-empty...

that way you have no where to go but up.

looks like i won't be moving this weekend. the lease is not ready and will supposedly be written up today and mailed to me. which was not what was agreed upon but whatever. the property "manager" (in quotes cause he don't do shit!) told sara that he has to review the apartment before i move in. that's neat and all, but he's known all month that this was going to happen. this shit should have been settled already. but it's not and now my move/my life is on hiatus.

i would really like to tell them all to shove it up their asses, but i won't find a deal like that anywhere near the city. the price is decent, the studio is big, there's always street parking and it's about 50 steps to 2 muni lines. i guess i just need to put up with the long commute & gas prices a little bit more.

hopefully not much longer. it's getting harder and harder to control my road rage.

AAHHHHHH!

ok, so the plan is (and has been) to move into my deluxe studio in the sky this weekend. saturday. october 30th. 30 hours from now. should i be worried that i don't have a lease yet??? cause i am.

worried is not really the word. I'M FUCKING FREAKING OUT. this whole month has just been a roller-coaster of emotions. i'm happy. i'm frustrated. i'm excited. i'm sad. i'm anxious. i'm mellow. i can't flippin take it anymore. one big obstacle that hung over my head had to do with javi (my youngest brother). he's starting a baking and pastry chef certificate program on november 1st at the california culinery academy. they may be a world renowned institution, but their admissions staff are a bunch of fuck-wads. and i know about fuck-wads. i work in admissions at fuck-wad state university. anyways, his financial aid didn't get settled until tuesday and it had my whole family's chonies in a wad. i don't remember having any problem with my financial aid. all i did was sign a whole bunch of paperwork. on the 5th of november i'll have payment 16 of 537,568 deducted from my checking account. NEAT!

so that's been taken care of and it truly is a great relief, but my futon is being delivered on saturday and I DON'T HAVE A LEASE. ok, i know, stop freaking out. everything will work out. blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. i can't help but feel, though, like i'm stuck in limbo. it's not my apartment yet. but then again, it's not like it's not mine. they know i'm moving in. i have the keys. (thanks sara!) i just need things to be settled. i need the legality of my signature on a fucking piece of paper. i need money to be exchanged. i need it to be mine.

movin' on up...to a deluxe studio in SF

so, as i touched upon in my last post, i'm moving back to the city after an 18 year (minus 6 months) hiatus. i have a feeling that this is it. the final jump out of the bird's nest i call 1## carlisle way. (the address has been hidden to protect Mones from stalkers.)

how do i feel about this? i'm definitely excited....a nervous kind of excited, but excited nonetheless. i think the financial aspects of it all are what's freaking me out the most, especially since i now have car payments. not cheap car payments. after i convince myself that i will be able to save money and budget (yeah, right) i'll then start to be sad about being away from my family. i know that sounds dumb. i'm 27 years old and i need to grow up and deal. but i find that the older i get the more attached to them i become. i think this has to do with the fact that the 90's were hard on my family. my brother married twice. my parents had to declare bankruptcy. tito and javi were really young and being raised by a series of central american 'nannies'. i fought a lot with my mom and then left for UOP. now, except for the fact that i sleep on the couch, everything is great.

but my delayed single girl in her 20's life and mental health need some attending to. my new digs are exactly 1.2 miles from work. until i find a new (read: better) job, my commute will be cut from 3-4 hours a day to about 20 mins. it's mind boggling. i still can't believe it. 20 freakin minutes! i'll be home everyday before 530pm. 530! it's INSANE! i think i'll start up a new hobbie. maybe i'll start going to the gym again.

so many possibilities. the world is my oyster.

go shorty, it (was) your birthday!

we gonna party like it (was) your birthday...

another year has come and gone. yesterday, my friends, i turned 27. i can hardly believe it. what the hell happened? one minute i'm all pumped about turning 15 and finally being able to wear makeup (which was NOT a promise that was kept, thank you very much, MOM!) to sitting at my desk yesterday morning staring at my computer screen thinking, "God, i wish i was 15 again".

but wait a minute. do i really wish i was 15 again? don't i always complain about how awful my high school years were? aren't i traumatized enough? is that really a time i want to re-live?!

kinda...

of course it's always a wish amended with "knowing what i know now". knowing what i know now, i definitely would have re-thought some of my 'fashion' choices. i wouldn't have acted like such a desperate spaz a lot of the time. nor would i have all those extremely embarrasing moments that i keep locked away in my memory. you know the ones that sometimes find a way of getting out. and those feelings of embarrassment and humiliation take you over while you are sitting in traffic on I80 in emeryville and make you want to get out of your car, crawl over the center divider and walk head-on into oncoming traffic?! yeah, those.

but that can't happen. i'm 27 and my life is what it is. and what it is, is great. i have a loving family and great friends. 2 of the things that i love most in the world, yet 2 of the things i don't appreciate enough. i may hate my job but, not everyone is lucky enough to get a paycheck every month. a big plus: it's a state job. this means that no matter how much time i spend online and writing stuff for my blog, i can't get fired. i will soon move into a KICK ASS studio apartment courtesy of my friend, sara. her move is my gain ;-) life is pretty good.

i like to kick, streeeetch, and kick....I'M 27!!!

back in the day when i was young, i'm not a kid anymore...

but somedays i sit and wish i was a kid again...

mcdonald's is giving out hello kitty toys with their happy meals. so far i've gotten the ballerina, the plush kitty and the calendar. they are sitting by my computer (but not in a sick rosie o'donnell-i-have-a-sick-obsession-with-happy-meal-toys-and throw-koosh-balls-at-people kind of way).

when i was in 2nd and 3rd grade i went to st. peter's catholic school in the mission. every year our teacher (i'd like to give a shout-out to mrs. reynolds and ms. rupp! what, what!) would give us a list of school supplies we were to have by the end of the first week of school. naturally, my mom would want to get all my supplies at the pak-n-save in colma. i would have to school her on the fact that anybody whose anybody gets their supplies at the hello kitty store on 24th. this is back in the day people, before it was known as sanrio. so, we compromised. we'd go to hello kitty first and spend a certain dollar amount and then get the rest at pak-n-save. i've often said that those 2 years at st. peter's were the best of my k-12 experience. every morning i'd walk to school with my cousins, mari and angelo. there were only 2 classes of each grade so everyone knew each other. all the girls in my grade would play high jump or chinese jump rope in the area between the school and the church. on fridays i'd order a grill cheese and salami sandwich and chocolate milk from the cafeteria. it was a safe and happy place. most of all, i was safe and happy.

...and hello kitty takes me back.

are there 4 or 7 horsemen of the apocalypse?

cause i think i see #4 turning the corner.

remember how i said, waaaay back in my first post, that i have nothing to do at work? well, for the past couple of days i actually had shit to do. like, yesterday, my inbox was full ALL morning. like, i didn't even get to it till like 3pm?!?! i'm pretty anal retentive when it comes to stuff like that so being able to see a full inbox out of the corner of my eye and NOT be able to get to it right away was KILLING. ME. but, being the super classy, always sassy, smart biz-notch that i am, i was able to finish all my work by COB. (close of business, for those not with it enough to use business acronyms.) but, alas, my competence has foiled me again for i am once more seeking solence on www.blogger.com.

so....what else do we talk about?

it's just another manic monday.....

i wish it were sunday....cause that's my fun day....

it's not really manic, though. i just don't know another song about mondays. except 'monday, monday' by the mamas and the papas, but i don't really know what the song is about. all i know is the chorus. don't want to reference it when i don't know what it's about. that would be dumb.

this morning actually started out ok. i left home at exactly 630am and made it into work and at my desk by 810am. i listened to michael moore promote his new book on howard stern this morning, i rocked out to 'nobody knows me' by madonna during the commercial break and i found street parking outside relatively quickly. the only bad part was this asshole in a mercedes that cut in front of me at the toll plaza. he looked like a 'todd'. like 'todd smith iv'. he probably has a trust fund and works at morgan stanley. i cursed him to hell.

so, i'm staring at my at-a-glance desk calendar. it's october. i'm looking at all the holidays. none of them, of course, being paid work holidays. the 15th is the first day of ramadan. ah-salaam-ah-ley-kim (i know that's not how you spell it, so shut up and ah-ley-kim-salaam me.) the 11th is thankgiving day in canada. stupid canadians. don't even know how to steal thanksgiving from us right. wait a minute....the 12th is 'day of the race' in mexico? what the fuck is that? is it some big marathon in mexico city that i've never heard of. did mexico get their own version of nascar? now is when i realize that it has been translated into english and that october 12th is dia de la raza.

it's funny how i don't automatically know to translate things. la raza is not a term that i would EVER translate into english, though. you really can't. it's one of the many terms that loses all meaning when you translate it. la raza isn't just a race of people. it's a mixing of 2 worlds and cultures to create one. mestizaje. it's the reason that i have blond, green eyed cousins in jalisco and why my uncle's skin is so dark he turns purple in the summer. no matter how much i talk shit, like it or not, la raza are my peeps.

MEXICA TIAHUI! VIVA LA RAZA!!!!!!!!

***this message has been brought to you by militant mones.

why the fuck did i even go to college then?!?!?!

ok, so i've been actively job hunting since mid-september (when my 2 homegirls at work finally were able to crawl out of this bottomless pit of negativity and soul-sucking hopelessness). i miraculously received calls from the first 2 places i submitted my resume at.

i interviewed at holy names university in oak-town last tuesday for the position of admissions counselor. i was looking like a tough bitch in my new pin-striped suit and feel like i had a really good interview, despite the fact that i was interviewed by 4 people, 2 of them being nuns. i think it was busting out with a piece from the 'sound of music' that sealed the deal. it's been a week and a day....no call yet from frauline maria.

the other call was for an admissions and records job at diablo valley college in concord. yes, concord does suck, but it's only 20 mins from b-town and one bridge toll instead of 2. unfortunately, it wasn't for an interview. the job required me to be able to type at least 40wpm and to prove it with a certification from the county human resources office. so on wednesday i drove my happy little ass over to walnut creek and took a typing test....actually it was more like 6 typing tests. having NEVER needed to take a typing test before, i didn't realize that after calculating your words per minute the flippin' computer DEDUCTS a word for EVERY single mistake you make. EVEN IF YOU CORRECT IT!!!!! so, although i was typing my ass off and getting as high as 56wpm all my mistakes were bringing it down to as low as 26wpm. the highest score i got was 36wpm. now, before any of you call me a retard and accuse me of only using my index fingers to type, i must inform you all that i use an ergonomic keyboard at work and the keyboard i used for the test WAS NOT ergonomic. my wrists would start hurting at about the 2 minute mark. (it was a 5 minute test.) the more tests i took, the worse my score, the more frustrated i became. i walked out hating the contra costa college community college district. my friends and co-workers tried to console me saying that it may not be such a big deal. they just may need to know that you can type. despite their good thoughts, i still felt like a dumb ass. my feelings of dumb assness were finally confirmed last night when i opened a letter from the human resources dept for the colleges of contra costa that read:

Other candidates who better met the qualifications and needs of the District were asked to proceed further in the process.

are they fucking telling me that my 2 years in graduate admissions and year and a half helping fucking clueless students at HSF aren't enough to fucking work at your dumb school? are they seriously telling me, that the ONLY way to be able to perform the duties for an admissions and records job is to type fast?!?!?! no brain usage required?!?!?!?!?!

i should of just done what all the other mexicans did and major in chicano/la raza studies. at least i'd know why i was not qualified for anything.

***this post is dedicated to the university of the pacific. twas not for your $96,000 education i would not be where i am today.

it's official: i'm a bitch

ok, so there's this guy. a real nice guy. for security purposes, let's call him, hmmmm, let's see.....'milhouse'.

ok, so milhouse is this really nice guy that i've talked to on the phone a couple of times. he lives in fairfield (shudder), about to move to vallejo, and works as a carpenter. he's tall, a decent person and seems genuinely interested in me. he wants to take me to see a movie this weekend. all morning i've been thinking of a way to get out of it.

i talked to him as i was driving home last night and found myself rolling my eyes every couple of minutes. i don't know if it was what he was saying or the way he was saying it. whatever it was, my eyes were working overtime. there was many a time where he would be talking and trail off in mid sentence and NOT SAY ANYTHING ELSE. did he lose his train of thought? did he not have anything else to say? i don't know cause the uncomfortable silence forced me to change topics. luckily, i'm driving my brother's car so i didn't have my headset. traffic was slow and a cop pulled up along side me and was with me for a couple of miles so i got off the phone.

i'm evil and karma is a bitch....i have the gum on the bottom of my shoe to prove it.

everybody's doing it!

yes, it's finally happened. i've jumped on the weblog bandwagon. so, what of it?!

i have to start this thing out by saying that i'm not really a fan of blogs. to be honest, they kinda annoy the shit out of me...yet i find myself logging on to them more and more each day. WTF?, you ask. the answer is really very simple. as a matter of fact, you've already read the answer in the heading.

I HAVE NOTHING TO DO AT WORK!!

my daily workload can be finished in about an hour, if i had it all in front of me at one time. unfortunately, i don't so it happens in sporadic spurts throughout my 8 hour day. so what do i occupy the other 7 hours with?? i occupy it with the greatest invention ever made.....EVER! some of you may have heard of it. it's called the internet. for those of you that don't know, it's pretty much the best thing ever invented. some people may think that there's no way of even knowing that. those people are dumb.

so i'm online most of the day. the news is really depressing. i've pretty much looked up everything there is to look up online that is not porn related. it takes www.televisionwithoutpity.com a week after airdate to post full recaps of my favorite shows, which get read the minute they are broadcast. E! fashion police pics get updated only twice a week. IMing my homies gets cut short due to their real jobs. (jen, i'm talking to you.) what's left? the wonderful world of blogs.

so friends, here is it. i'm not promising you guys anything coherent or without spelling and grammatical errors. i'm just gonna log on whenever i'm done with "work". and whenever i feel like rocking your world....SUPERSONIC!

peace in da middle east,
mones (ms. chavez if you're nasty)